Stephen King

Originally published Wednesday September, 27th 2006

This illustrious organization was founded on the principle that everyone can be successful and have a voice to speak their ideas, even people who've been given a name as plain as one given to millions each year, Steve! Every so often, The Axis of Stevil takes pleasure in shining the proverbial spotlight on a Steve who shows excellence in their field.

In an ongoing effort to keep people awake at night, without resorting to caffeine and/or pills, The Axis of Stevil would like to bow to the Master of Horror, Stephen King!

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Stephen Edwin King was born in Portland, Maine on September 21st, 1947. His older brother, David, was adopted, making Stephen the only naturally born child from Donald Edwin King and Ruth Pillsbury King. Stephen, along with his mother and brother, traveled through many states in several years after his father said he was stepping out to smoke a cigarette and never came back.

Stephen began his writing career in January 1959 when he and his brother began to publish their own local newspaper, titled “Dave’s Rag.” We’re not sure why it wasn’t called “Steve’s Rag”, but at least they were going in the right direction. He graduated from Libson High in Libson, Maine, and became a Black Bear at the University of Maine, where he studied in Science and English. Stephen continued to publish short stories during and after college. On January 2, 1971, he married Tabitha Jane Spruce and took a teaching job that fall at Hampden Academy, where he earned $6,400. In 1973, Stephen submitted a story about a teenage girl named Carietta White to Doubleday, who later sold the story to New American Library for $400,000. Stephen would receive half of that. From then on, he decided to continue writing, eventually having many of his novels made into movies.

The Axis of Stevil couldn’t fathom a world without a great Steve such as Stephen King. Why, we’d rather be stuck working The Graveyard Shift at the Cat’s Eye Pet Cemetery, bored to death with your co-worker Joe, while trying to figure out where you two left off on your conversation from last night, and he says, “I was talking about my wife, Christine being Paranoid because their daughter, Carrie, is becoming Thinner so she can impress The Lawnmower Man whenever he cuts The Green Mile outside of Salem’s Lot,” to which you say, “It’s always something with you Children of the Corn (Joe and his family are from Nebraska). We were also discussing how Napoleon Bonaparte’s Desperation was the Firestarter to the conquering of France while staging a Coup, Joe.” Now that doesn’t sound like much fun at all.

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